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Mums Reveal the Most Hilariously Brutal Things Their Children Have Said to Them About Their Appearance

Mums Reveal the Most Hilariously Brutal Things Their Children Have Said to Them About Their Appearance

We’re all too well aware that children do not have a filter when they speak. They say exactly what’s on their little minds with no regard for hurt feelings or diplomacy. It’s one of the things that we adore about our little people, but it’s also something that we tend to train out of them before they go out into the world offending others left and right with their brutal honesty.

Hundreds of mums have been sharing their children’s unfiltered thoughts about their appearances on the popular UK parenting platform Mumsnet, and in all seriousness, it’s a laugh and a half. Kids really do say the darndest things as we’re sure you’ll agree!

It all started when the poster known as MakeItRain recounted her recent experience and asked others to share their own.

Here are some of the choicest responses for everyone’s enjoyment:

◈ “Thanks for making my birthday cake mum….. Next year can you make it with some taste.”

◈ A six-year-old girl says: “I actually can’t believe Nana isn’t dead yet.”

◈ “My three-year-old likes to refer to me as piggy every once in a while.”

◈ DD snuck into my bed in the morning for a snuggle. “Mummy stop breathing, the air from your lungs smells like poo.”

◈ “Mummy if you’re 10 years younger than daddy, why do you look much older?”

◈ “It was a hot summer, I was heavily pregnant and wearing a yellow sundress. My two year old declared that I looked like La-La, a Teletubby.”

◈ Son, aged five, tells his mother: “You do look weird without your make-up. You need that make-up don’t you!”

◈ “When I grow up and I’m a woman, I won’t have a moustache like you will I?”

◈ “Why are your boobies so sad? Look, they keep staring at the floor.”

◈ “Your hair’s beautiful mummy. It’s just like Professor Snape’s.”

◈ One mum asked her three-year-old son why he wasn’t eating his potatoes. He shakes his head forlornly and says: “They are SO disappointing mummy.”

◈ New haircut, quite short, sweepy fringe. “ooh, mummy you look like a pretty Hitler”

◈ Another mum says: “My three-year-old gently stroked my cheek and said ‘You’re so beautiful. My heart melted until he followed it up with, ‘You’re so beautiful Bettina’. For those who don’t know, Bettina is the cow from Paw Patrol.”

◈ Five-year-old to her mum: “Your hair looks lovely like this. You look like Hagrid (Harry Potter character).”

◈ “Mummy, I really love you … even though you’re so boring most of the time.”

◈ Just about to go out and say to DH “do I look fat?” “No” he replies,” you look lovely”. Four year old pipes up “you DO look lovely Mummy. And fat”.

◈ My then-3yo DS was playing in my room whilst I was getting dressed. He stopped playing to tell me “Mummy, I love your dangly boobies”.

Too funny! Do have one of your own to share? Tell us in the comments!


Jill is a busy wife and mother of four young children. She loves nothing more than making people giggle, and loves to settle in with a glass of wine (or four) and wander about the internet. Feel free to follow her to see all the cool stuff she finds!

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