Having had five children, four under five, and then a bonus baby three years later, I understand all too well the controversial opinions a typical pregnancy entices in people. It’s like they can’t help themselves. A women with a pregnant belly seems to unwillingly invite eager onlookers an unwanted right of passage to their loaded opinions.

Common folk are quite judgmental at the best of times, although when a woman is with child, the eyes of judgment seem to set their focus onto tunnel vision. Everyone is a critic and they come out of the woodwork in order to voice an opinion. Uneducated or seemingly good intentional.

Everyone.

From family members, to colleagues, to strangers in the street, to your partner’s single childless friends, to the postman.

“Are you really going to have that coffee!!”

“Should you really be eating that ??”

“That’s too heavy for you to lift!”

” A sip of champagne while toasting! You know that crosses the placenta don’t you?”

Or, if these outspoken folk are kind enough to keep their opinions to themselves, they may choose the manipulation route and throw you daggers with their all knowing, all judging eyes.

I have an idea. How about we treat pregnant women with the same respect that we treat everyone else who is entitled to their own lives.

How about, until told otherwise, we assume pregnant women are actually responsible adults who know very well the do’s and don’ts of maintaining a healthy pregnancy. Let’s assume that these women are actually regularly attending visits with a trained medical professional and would never place their unborn baby at risk. Until told otherwise, let’s assume these are informed women, who have in fact done the research and are making educated decisions about their body and that of their unborn child.

While there are the concerned types that fear you are causing your unborn baby harm by the most ludicrous of gestures, there is always the other side of the coin. There is the bitter portion who think you’re soft for quitting your packet a day cigarette habit.

“Rubbish. In my day, we could drink and smoke to our hearts content and our babies turned out just fine.”

“You’re tired! In my day we would place our 40kg toddler on our backs and go work 18 hour days in the rice fields.”

“You’re finding it tough! You don’t even know what tough is! You women these days are too precious.”

I have another thought!

How about we treat pregnant women with the same respect that we treat everyone else who is entitled to their own lives.

How about, until told otherwise, we assume pregnant women are actually responsible adults who know very well the do’s and don’ts of maintaining a healthy pregnancy. Let’s assume that these women are actually regularly attending visits with a trained medical professional and would never place their unborn baby at risk.

Until told otherwise, let’s assume these are informed women, who have in fact done the research and are making educated decisions about their body and that of their unborn child.

Each women’s pregnancy journey is her own and the loaded opinions of others should really hold no merit or validation in their decisions.

Am I alone in having felt this way?

Are you, or were you made to feel as though you were never living up to the sanctity of pregnancy?

Were you made to feel like a failure of a parent before you even had the chance to meet your precious little bundle of joy?

Would love to hear your experiences.